Safety Planning

Establish a code word with a trusted friend or neighbor that signals you need emergency help

Identify two exit routes from every room in your home, including windows

Avoid arguments in rooms with potential weapons — kitchens, garages, or tool rooms

Keep important documents (IDs, financial records, medications) accessible in case you need to leave quickly

Prepare and keep an emergency bag ready in a discreet location or with a trusted person

Memorize the numbers you need most — in case your phone is taken or broken

If safe to do so, tell a trusted neighbor your situation and ask them to call 911 if they hear a disturbance

Teach children the safety code word and where to go if they hear or see it used

Timing matters — try to leave when your abuser is calm, asleep, or away from home

Pack your emergency bag in advance; add to it over time without raising suspicion

Open a bank account your abuser does not know about, even if you can only contribute small amounts

Contact a local DV shelter before leaving — they can help you create a customized plan

Tell a trusted person your plan and timeline so someone knows where you are going

Know your legal options: protective orders, emergency custody, and legal aid resources

Bring your children and pets if safe — do not plan to return for them without help

Leave important documents (passport, birth certificates, Social Security cards) with a trusted person or in your emergency bag

Teach children a safety code word and practice a family safety plan age-appropriately

Instruct children not to intervene during a violent incident — leave and get help instead

Identify a safe house children can go to (neighbor, family member) if danger occurs

Keep custody documentation and children's records accessible

Notify your child's school or daycare once you have left — restrict pickup to authorized persons

Protect children's school records, medical records, and passports

Reassure children that the abuse is never their fault and never about them

Tell a trusted colleague or HR representative about your situation — they can assist with security

Request that your employer screen calls and flag any contact from your abuser

Vary your routes to and from work — do not follow a predictable schedule

Park in different spots each day and ask a colleague to walk you to your vehicle if needed

Consider informing school security about the situation and providing a photo of your abuser

Request a protective order listing your workplace as a protected location

Change all passwords immediately — use a password manager and do not reuse passwords

Enable two-factor authentication using an authenticator app, not SMS

Check devices for tracking apps, spyware, or monitoring software — consider a factory reset

Use a safe device (public library, trusted friend's phone) for sensitive searches

Clear your browser history after visiting this page or use a private/incognito window

Review all location-sharing settings on Apple/Google/social accounts

Log out of shared streaming services, cloud accounts, and location-sharing apps

Create a new email address your abuser does not know about